Many people in our lives are more than just friends but do not qualify as your lover as well. This could be an undefined relationship, and we can not label it. Keep on reading to know about more than friends but not boyfriend and girlfriend, in which you can like each other but not in any romantic relationship. It will help to clarify more things for the readers.
It is a confusing relationship to be in as you are close to someone but not an intimate boyfriend or girlfriend. It happens when two people start dating each other’s best friend or if they go on dates very often.
If you are more than friends but not dating, we will call it a situationship. You act like a couple, but officially, it is not as if you do not want to be exclusive. However, you can have romantic feelings for each other, but any of you do not want to commit. It could be one of the most frustrating types of relationships.
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What is situationship?
It happens when you understand each other like friends and do things like a couple, but still, you do not have any commitment. It is sometimes confusing and frustrating, and this undefined scenario is known as situationship.
Such individuals have fun together and are intimate but do not commit to each other or plan. It is complicated as you are unsure whether you see someone and are confused about whether their response is appropriate.
A situationship is a relationship without any commitment. In such arrangements, people experience the benefits of a relationship while staying single. Friends with benefits know about the risks unless you are careful; someone will catch feelings.
When you are in a situationship, your partner may feel super hot or cold, as one minute you see they are invested in the relationship, and the next minute they give the cold shoulder. Lack of one-on-one time outside the bedroom or you are not going on dates in the presence of other people means you do not have a deep emotional connection.
Situationship rules
Situationship is a temporary relationship usually sustained on benefits from both sides. These certain benefits could be in the form of material, emotional or physical needs, and there is no commitment to last forever. A situationship can be successful only if both parties follow the rules, and if each of them falls in love, it is over and will not work for long.
1.Remember that the other person does not belong to you.
Simple as that, they are not your girl or your man, so do not convince yourself that you two are together. If they hang out with other people and not with you, there is no need to get mad as you do not own them. Instead, you try to keep busy with other stuff and choose your friends.
It does not matter how much one-on-one time you guys spend together, and he can choose someone else over you. But if you have started feeling for them and getting mad if they prefer someone else over you. You can open up, end this entangled thing or build a relationship.
2.No hangouts
Usually, partners in a situationship meet each other in an enclosed place. If you both plan to find love in other areas, avoid going on vacations or dinner dates, or even do not celebrate special days together. These things can make people think that you guys are dating.
3.Take what they say to heart
If someone is honest with you and openly tells you they are not serious or interested in any relationship, and it is what they mean, do not try to change their mind as you will lose your trying to do so. If it does not align with what you want, then there is no need to continue; leave it and continue with what you truly desire.
4.Pay attention to how the other person is treating you
Actions are always louder than words, as they tell all. Do not make up things in your mind that will not come true. Please focus on the efforts being made to indicate whether they fulfil commitments.
5.Avoid calling each other cute names
Avoid calling cute names that indicate love, such as baby, honey, darling, etc., that give the wrong impression. It could be an indication that you are feeling for them. Call them by their name if you do not want to get into any relationship.
6.Could you not post them on social media?
If you feel it is a short-term engagement, do not share anything with them in your public social life. Secondly, do not introduce them to your family, parents, or siblings. If they denounce the relationship in the future, it will be difficult for you to explain your acquaintances. Meanwhile, if you find love in someone else, quit the situationship and move on with your right partner.
7.Never give up on your options
Please do not get so caught up in your faux relationship that it overcomes your single life. Remember that you are not in a committed relationship, so there is no need to follow the rules. Stay honest with yourself, and never hesitate to move on when you have had enough.
Situationship vs. Relationship
Situationship is a grey area between friendship and a relationship, a weird place with no man’s land of love.
One can have this undeniable connection, but they are still friends as you love talking to them about different men and every topic. However, you can notice a burst of jealousy while talking about other men. If you, too, feel the same way, then you are a half-girlfriend.
In the early stages of a relationship, it is hard to know the exact relationship. A situationship is typically an undefined romantic relationship. If you are confused about your relationship status with another person, you might be in a situationship. An unclear romantic relationship but it may involve feelings.
Being in a relationship means a specific romantic relationship involving emotional and physical intimacy. In addition, some ongoing commitment and monogamy levels are sexually and emotionally exclusive.
Signs of Relationship
Knowing the signs of a Relationship is important so you can recognize it. Understanding your relationship status or any situationship will keep you from investing too many emotions in any connection.
No commitment
The main difference between a situationship and a real relationship is that there is no commitment. Both individuals have no strings attached; they are single and continue dating if they wish. They both do not have responsibilities or duties towards each other. And one can not expect anything from them to show up the same way a boyfriend can.
Non-defining the relationship
In this age of casual sex culture, you do not know exactly where you stand with your partner. There is no classic courtship in which physical intimacy follows emotional intimacy, and it would be hard to know what your sexual partner thinks about your relationship.
It is hard to know when this kind of thing is appropriate. The risk might scare the individuals off; you may be too early in a relationship to ask such questions. Clear things up can take too long, and you are usually on totally different pages. Or your partner does not want to talk about it as he does not need it to be put in concrete terms.
Secrecy in terms of the relationship
When you feel like each other more than friends but not dating, your friends and family members will not know about each other. It means both of you want to keep the relationship private. Instead of hanging around, you both feel like spending time alone.
Anxious and frustrating
One more clear sign that you are in a situationship is that you feel a lot of anxiety around it. In comparison, committed relationships will give you certainty and security. When your relationship status is unclear, you feel stress due to an uncertain situation.
Inconsistency
When you are in a relationship with someone for a certain amount of time, but you are unaware of the time of the next meeting, or you hear a word from them. In a relationship, you count on your partner to respond to you well in every situation and keep up with planned activities. If you lack interest in your current partner, you are not in a serious relationship. Consistency depicts the level of investment in any relationship.
Lack of consistency shows that your partner does not know the term of the relationship, and they are fine with situationship. Define the connection from a very early stage that will help you manage expectations and act accordingly.
No future talk
Partners plan the future in some capacity and involve some future time frame. It does not mean having long-term planning; it can affect a few weeks or months. Many may include meeting the family, attending any event, or any future logistics together. In situations, your partner will dodge the question or respond coldly.
They are not serious
If your partner himself says that he is not serious, believe him. Do not get betrayed whether you are doing a couple of things, including date nights or even emotional connection. They do not want it if they say they do not need anything serious.
You do not meet his friends
If you are seeing someone for some specific time and have never met anyone important to them, that is probably a sign that you are not in a relationship. If your partner feels you are a priority, he will introduce you to the people close to him.
Shallow connection
If they avoid any deep conversation, you are in a situationship, not in any relationship. In the early stages of a relationship, one can feel the connection on the surface level, and slowly, you start getting to know each other and forming a firm bond.
A surface-level connection illustrates well that you both have nothing in common and want a superficial relationship. Secondly, you are not interested in forming any deeper emotional connection.
Based on convenience
Mostly, people go for the relationship with convenience, as someone living in the same city or friend group. In Relationships, people want to spend time together; in relationships, it is a random kind of invite based on free time. Lack of planning and meet-ups are based on convenience.
Types of situationships?
A relationship is any association between people; that connection could be intimate, spiritual, positive, or negative. Situationships come in various shapes and sizes, and there could be variations within each category.
The convenience situationship
The situation is based on convenience rather than any real emotion or connection. Both people will see each other when they are free at a specific time. They are busy in their own lives, and people do not rearrange plans to make time for each other.
The passionate situationship
It’s when two people have an intense connection and are unwilling to move forward for any reason. They are not getting into any serious relationship, maybe they are not ready for a commitment, or both are too busy in their own lives at a certain moment. Or the passion is largely physical, or both partners feel that their lifestyles are not compatible although having great chemistry.
Friends with benefits situationship
In this situationship is when two people have each other as a shoulder to lean on and trust on them. It is like a crossover between friendship and a sexual urge. It involves regular communication, spending time together, and doing things outside the bedroom while hanging out.
One-sided situationship
As depicted by its name, one person puts more effort and takes things further while the other partner is not thinking the same way. One person always does more than their capacity in the hope of changing the items according to desire, while the other person never cares that much. But in the end, that trying partner will feel hurt and confused.
Purely physical situationship
Here partners solely focus on a physical connection, and there is no strings attached type of equation. Both of the partners can have their own life outside the arrangements. However, it could be a short-term arrangement and usually depends on the location of both parties.
Almost relationship situation
When two people are at a point close to a committed relationship, they are still not ready to make it official. They might be reluctant due to unfortunate timings, or the individuals must work on something more serious. But eventually, such situationships turn into real relationships.
Drunk-dial situationships
A situationship usually happens after a night out with friends who are just acquaintances. It is a physical thing, and there is no emotional connection involved. This arrangement works for both individuals as there are no strings attached.
The office situationship
It occurs between two people working in the same organisation due to proximity and convenience. Depending on the working relationship, the office situationship could be complicated, and usually, things end badly.
The comfortable situationship
In this thing, two people already know each other’s wants and needs, and there is always a certain level of familiarity in comfort. It works out well for both parties, and no overthinking, and it is all about relaxation and ease.
In-Denial situationship
It occurs when two people like each other but are afraid to admit it, and they refuse to acknowledge the feelings out of fear, rejection, or commitment. This situation can lead to confusion and frustration due to a lack of courage. These feelings are strong enough to ignore, but one must communicate openly; otherwise, it will remain unclear.
Commitment-phobic situationship
It happens when two people avoid making any commitment to each other. There is always an unwillingness to commit due to fear of getting hurt. Such individuals will never communicate their feelings openly due to some hidden fear of vulnerability. In simple words, such people have commitment phobia, will not jump into a relationship easily, and will stay stagnant in situationship.
The rebound situationship
It usually occurs after the end of a long-term relationship as people look for something to fill the vacant situation. The recent breakup can cloud the feelings and come from a place of desperation that can be damaging in the long run.
Long-distance situationship
As travelling has become more affordable and technology is making it easier to keep in touch, it is quite common nowadays. Two individuals may be thousands of miles apart but visit each other semi-regularly. This type of situationship fizzles out when a person stops seeing for any specific reason. But relatively, there is a very low chance of making things turn into serious things.
Toxic situationships
A situationship is any romantic relationship with no label on it. It is not always a toxic relationship; sometimes, it could be quite healthy. Best friends but not lovers or being in a situationship is almost a relationship, but they are casually hooking up but have not defined the relationship.
Just like many other relationships, situationship work or not. Situationships never come with boundaries, expectations, or any future. People have their own emotions, motives, and history. The only person who can decide what is best for you is yourself, whereas uncertainty in anything can harm your mental health.
In such situations, people also suffer from decreased self-esteem and loneliness due to a potential lack of emotional attachment. Everyone has different feelings, but it is important to understand your valid feelings.
There is no shame in having any relationship you want, but situationships come with undefined and unclear things. Stability and clear boundaries give you peace of mind, and the lack of these both can harm your mental health. Openness and communication will keep both parties from getting hurt, so always keep an eye on the terms of your arrangements in any relationship.
In a casual relationship, men continue to string their mate along, like you can say, friends with benefits or a no-strings-attached fling. It is a tactic men use to keep a steady hook-up without any adult responsibility of having a partner. But behaviour in situationships can cause quite underrated damage.
No two individuals have identical emotions or the same truths, so always communicate and decide what is healthy and feels best for you. If the uncertainty of your relationship is causing you some mental harm, it is time to re-evaluate your situation.
What are the signs of being in toxic situationships?
- You have feelings for your partner, but there is no reciprocation for such emotions.
- The other person is not willing to communicate.
- Circumstances are making you more stressed, anxious, and upset than usual.
- The happy moments with the person are few and far between.
- You are overwhelmed by uneasy and anxious feelings.
- You are feeling low and not your best self.
How long do situationships last?
Situationships last as long as it benefits both parties, so they can last for weeks, months, or even years. If the situationship is stagnant, both parties will plan to move on. However, it can last longer but remember, it is not healthy to stick around, so one must move on. It could be a complicated and emotional process, and it takes time to make the right decision.
In some situationships, people do not follow classic relationship guidelines, which could be unhealthy. It may involve only physical intimacy but no feelings and no commitments. These short-lived relationships can be very confusing as you can not make long-term plans with your situationship partner.
The honest evaluation of the time of a situationship depends on the compatibility of the two parties. It could be good or bad for both parties as it could be a transitional phase to a more serious relationship. It may be ideal for people who do not want any relationship but want to continue the emotional and physical connection.
Conclusion
People who are more than friends but not boyfriends or girlfriends do not have a deep emotional connection—recognizing that you are in a situationship or a relationship will save you a lot of heartbreak in the long run. It cannot be easy to keep your feelings out of it when you feel someone’s words do not align with their actions.
This type of relationship is undefined, which causes anxiety, and it can be difficult to know where you stand with someone. It can be painful that the person you see is not exclusive. The best thing one can take from a situationship is the lessons you learn about yourself, which will help you boost your strength, resilience, or ability to express your emotions and grow.
In such a situation, people are best friends but not lovers, and it could be an excellent compromise for two people who want to figure out their personal lives. Eventually, it is not a right fit and can lead to heartbreak.