Marriage is pretty freakin’ awesome.
You have found that one person that you want to spend forever with. On your big day and surely after brides and grooms are bombarded with marriage truths, but there are just some things that NOBODY tells you. Truths and life lessons that you just won’t find out about your “perfect” soul-mate until you are actually hitched.
We’ve got 20 of the most terrible, exciting, surprising, and unknown facts about marriage that no one tells you below. These were taken straight from the source – married people!
Table of Contents
20. The More Things Change…
Everything doesn’t change after you get married. If you’re in the right relationship and you marry the right person the only thing that should change is maybe your last name and the box you check on forms. Once you marry they aren’t going to just become a different person.
There bad traits will get worse and their good traits will stay the same. If he yells now, he’ll only yell more after the I do’s. If she doesn’t cook now, she ain’t gonna serve up fresh home cookin’ later.
19. Sickness Happens
That whole ‘in sickness and in health’ thing will come up more than you think—like when you have to nurse him through a bad hangover or he has to help soothe your raging PMS. Now that’s lasting love.
Oh, and when your hubby is sick – yeah he’s going to act like a baby and want to be taken care of. When you get sick though, you’re expected to still do all of your responsibilities. Get ready.
18. No Clone Zone
Be friends, not clones of each other, and enjoy what you both bring to the table. She may be sloppy and you’re a neat freak. News flash – that ain’t gonna change, deal with it, embrace the difference, and put the aggravation aside. You’ll avoid a bunch of resentment and fights that way.
17. New Info
Marriage isn’t boring. You’ll be continually amazed by how much your husband surprises you with a new story, some “best friend” you’ve never heard of, and some distant cousin whose name has never been mentioned.
Then there will be the times when he tells the same old story, over and over again. Cherish those memories, pass them on to the kiddoes, and embrace each others pasts.
16. You Get The Whole Package
When you marry your husband…yeah you’re marrying him and his whole family. Think Everybody Loves Raymond is a joke? Nope, that’s real life.
A mother-in-law that’s crazy and snoopy…possibly. A dead-beat brother that scares your children, perhaps. Know that going in. Meet them, eat with them, see if you can stand them. If you can’t – no matter how awesome he is it’s not going to work or it will be a constant stressor on your relationship.
15. Go To Sleep Angry
Yeah, you read that right. During a late night fight, don’t sit up for hours trying to find common ground just because the words “Never go to bed angry” are beaten into your heads. The longer you fight, the more irritable you’ll get and one of you will say something you’ll regret.
Just lay down and everything will be clearer in the morning. You’ll have time to cool off – think about what’s going on the mistakes you’ve made and that your spouse made and have a better chance of working through the issue.
Don’t think this is sweeping it under the rug – it’s not. The problem needs to be dealt with, but sometimes dealing with it before sleeping is just not the right time.
14. I Want to Leave
You have to be OK with each other having some alone time each day and guy time and girl time without each other, often. It’s healthy for the relationship.
Even though you love your spouse and enjoy time with them, spending to much time together actually hurts the relationship. Without time a part you don’t learn to appreciate them, what they do, and who they are. This is especially hard for couples that work from home or work together – even more important for them to have time apart with friends.
13. Dirty Sex
Keep the fights clean and the sex dirty! Don’t bring up past mistakes, your ex’s, problems you’ve experienced together. Stop throwing out insults, low blows, and curses. No need for name calling or dirty tricks.
This is the person you love and are going to spend the rest of your life with. Those things you say when you are so upset – yeah they can’t ever be taken back. Even if you didn’t mean them, they’ll be burned and etched into your loved ones mind.
Keep it clean in the fight, use the dirty talk for the bedroom.
12. Everybody Poops
Yeah, you’ll get comfortable passing gas, vomiting, or even pooping around your husband/wife. It sounds silly, but most people are terrified to do any of things. Get used to it – poop happens and when ya gotta go ya gotta go.
11. I’m Serious Bro!
Don’t take each other too seriously. It leads to arguments. No kidding – sometimes sarcasm and funny jokes are just that…no ulterior motive or hidden agenda. Your spouse likes to tease and joke around – deal with it.
10. Keep That Train Rollin’
You got married, why do we need to date? Because it’s important that’s why! For a healthy relationship (ESPECIALLY after having kids) go out on dates. Get dressed up, put on your best, do your hair and nails, spray the cologne, and go have fun together. It’s important to remember why you got married in the first place. And keep that fire a goin’.
9. Like a Fine Wine
Your relationship will get even better after you get married! You might have so much fun together that you’ll give yourselves years to just enjoy being married before you have kids. That’s not a bad thing! Enjoy the time and excitement together, loving one another, growing your friendship, and doin’ the nasty anytime you want!
8. I’m Gonna Go Crazy!
When you’re dating, your spouses little quirks are “cute”. You don’t realize how insanely nuts his little habits like singing in the morning and whistling will make you. You will want to drive a sledgehammer through his eyeball. But, eventually you’ll start to like them. And then if he stops doing them, you’ll actually miss them.
7. When Are You…
You’ll be shocked by how outsiders seem to view your relationship as being way more serious now and how eager they’ll be for you to have kids right away – even if you’re not ready. Get ready for the onslaught of the question, the family pressure, and the fact that nobody tells you how hard it is raising little tikes when they ask you when you’re gonna make some.
6. Everyday I’m Poopin’
Boys poop a lot. No Joke. Like, a lot a lot. So just get used to it. He can’t help it and he definitely can’t help the smell. Brace yourself.
5. It’s Actual Work
Yeah, nobody really stresses how much actual work a marriage is. Hard work at that – every single day. But, as the saying goes – “Anything that is worth doing, isn’t easy.”
4. They Will Hang It Wrong
Your spouses way of hanging the toilet paper will be wrong. You may hang it on the top or the bottom, but believe you me – they’ll hang it the other way…and that ain’t right. These little tiny surprises, yeah they’re not wrong and you’re not right. Their way is just different. Get used to it.
3. Be a Fan
When you get married, you’re promising to be your spouses biggest fan – always. That means believing in them, helping them, and trusting in them. Even when things get desparate, keep on blowin’ out those praises. It’s not easy, but it’s the secret ingredient to get through those tough times and come out the otherside stronger.
2. Just Sayin’
Honesty is what all healthy relationships are built on. Right? Yeah, we’ve all heard and it’s true. But come on – if you ask your husband “Does this make me look fat” and it honestly DOES do you want him to tell you that? Don’t play – you don’t. So, temper that honesty with respect and love. That’s what they should tell you.
1. Escalators Ain’t Fun
Think women are the only ones that are emotional? Get real. Men have emotions, too. And they’re even worse at controlling and understanding them then women. So don’t get surprised when you ask your husband to take out the trash and he blows up in your face about it.
Chalk it up to a bad day, tension at work, stress about the house, or just a random bad attitude. It’s not personal and don’t add fuel to the fire.